Friday, January 9, 2015

He's Making Melodies Over Me

 
The unknown... How scary right? Can't I sit where I'm comfortable, where I feel safe, life seems good here and my faith seems strong. Yes let me stay here. 
Well if you looked into my heart you would see that's  where I would like to be. Let's be honest for a minute.. I hate change. The unknown is scary, it's a place we have yet to go, we don't understand it, and we have no control over it. Thinking ahead is freaky. I cringe just thinking about all the things that could could go wrong, and how my response will be to it all. Unknown... New things.... Change....Growing  
From a negative perspective, change can seem terrifying but from a positive, it can be beautiful. I believe that in order to see change in a beautiful way, we have to focus on seeing things through Christ' perspective. Since starting 2015 I have been able to look back at this year and praise Jesus for the work He has done in my life. On a grand scale looking back at this past year seems so small. The events in my life don't seem very important, but one thing that stands out is that I am able to look back and see that Jesus paid attention. He was involved in the tiniest parts of my life. 
One thing I didn't expect was that change included getting me out of my comfort zone so I could grow and since we know how I feel about that you can know that I wasn't too happy about. Hours crying, lost friendships, gained friendships, my faith being tested, and getting pushed out of my Christian bubble.. Can't forget the part where I complained the whole time too. There were many times I cried out to Jesus and I don't doubt for a second that He wasn't there. But there were times where I felt He may have been silent and that's fine, He ultimately knows what I need. 
He knew what He was doing all along, He has got me in the palm of His hand. Why?  Because He cares. Get that? He cares about our wants and desires and I believe that deep down He saw the desire of my heart, which is where He planted himself and the desire to know Him more. 
He did just that. 
All of those prayers I said, all of those songs I sing.. They aren't just words, they have meaning. Jesus doesn't mess around guys, He listens to our heart. 
I have been blown away again, by seeing the goodness of The Lord. Looking back at this year, it was filled with struggle and a great amount of tears. I had many ups and downs like I said I'm not good with change but there was so much for me to learn. Jesus had and still has so much in store for me. He had to pull me closer, and getting to see a piece of the fathers heart keeps me coming back for more. 
He doesn't always want us where it's comfortable, and that thought<— as much as it sucks , I've learned that the joy is in the journey, even when being dragged along kicking and screaming- It's what I needed. I look back at this past year and I see a small piece of the picture, I see an ending of an incredibly hard, but beautiful season. I couldn't be more thankful for this year. I can see things a little bit more clear, it's not messy and ugly as I once thought. I see a good shepherd guiding me, I  see a sovereign God, who knew what He was doing all along. 

But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing joyful praises forever. Spread your protection over them, that all who love your name may be filled with joy.
 Psalm 5:11 NLT

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Psalm‬ ‭23‬:‭1-3‬ ESV

The LORD leads with unfailing love and faithfulness all who keep his covenant and obey his demands. 
Psalm 25‬:‭10‬ NLT

"I cried out to the Lord in my great trouble, and he answered me."
 Jonah 2:1 

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.
 2 Corinthians‬ ‭4‬:‭8-9‬ NLT

Shepherd- Amanda Cook/ Bethel


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